Wednesday, November 28, 2018

Emojis and Emoticons: The New Language of Love


At it again...all for you.


by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World

Excerpt from upcoming book "Conversations in Hyperreality and Other Thoughts Umberto Eco and Dave Barry Never Had".

Click this LINK to download free PDF for your personal enjoyment.

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Monday, November 26, 2018

Social engineering by force of law: The Bullies' Way.


At it again...all for you.


by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World
Social engineering by force of law is merely a mask for a greater evil. The greater evil of eliminating freedom. Freedom to worship, freedom to live by a higher moral standard, freedom to protect family, self, and property, freedom to own, freedom to pass along to children and grandchildren principles of conduct that safeguard and strengthen the very fabric of our communities and families.

That greater evil demands our attention. Call them out for what they are: Bullies. Bullies who demand agreement or they will make life a living hell, stop you from doing business, shut down your places of worship, decree who will and who will not be your teachers, and more.

Bar none, bullies are everywhere, on every side of every issue. Bullies are weak of moral spine and are only interested in themselves. Bullies never sacrifice themselves for the greater good and are narrow of mind. Bullies blame and whine as they focus on the negative. Bullies do not have positive goals.

Bullies celebrate all that is weak. Bullies cannot bear to hear an opinion when it does not agree with them. Because they have no solid foundation for their position, they hurl vile insults loud and long, using the amplification of social media, businesses, and a willing press — of whom many are bullies themselves. Bullies find and use the easily duped and weak of mind.

Strength of character is anathema to bullies who cannot help but shudder in disgust when they find themselves around those of strong character. Bullies never have a problem with smiling as they insult, but they always make sure they do so while surrounded by their acolytes. Yes, bullies are afraid to stand alone for what they believe.

They do not hold truth as sacred. They worship the lie and sow disinformation. They produce discord and shove wedges between people for no other reason than to manipulate for self-interest.

Whether by political or religious means or through threats to job security, bullies always exploit those who are willing to go along and say nothing.



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Monday, November 19, 2018

The Vagina Wars: BREAKING NEWS from YOUR CITIZEN JOURNALIST... ERRRR... HUMORIST!!!!!



by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World
Business writer.  Songwriter.  Protecting creator's copyrights. 


DATELINE: TODAY. 
CLOCK: SOMETIME THIS MORNING.
WHERE: ATLANTA-ISH, GEORGIA


Nut graph:
Mr. Lou-Lou Frakkakhan is working hand in hand with pussy-hat wearers who oppose the famous and witty play The Vagina Monologues.

Main body of arrrrtickle:
While Lou-Lou (as he would prefer to be known) chants "DEATH TO AMERICA AND JEWS!", Socialist haters chant "CHANGE THE SCRIPT OR SHUT IT DOWN!"

Frakkakhan and an anonymous androgynous ambisexual gender fluid studies leader issued a joint press release at a live event on some stairs in front of a government building somewhere wherein they confirmed their joint goal of annihilation of common enemies by any means.

"We stand before you today," Frakkakhan boomed into fawning FLOTSAM microphones. "And because we stand here YOU. MUST. TAKE. US. SERIOUSLY. Hold your questions while my fellow opposition leader speaks."

The anonymous androgynous ambisexual gender fluid studies leader then moved to the bank of microphones and waited for the cameras to stop making that racket so she could be heard clearly. "Good afternoon, evening, morning, or whatever time of day you decide it is. We are inclusive of all time-counting methods and opinions except for Drumpf's because he is wrong all the time. Please! Please! Hold your questions AND YOUR APPLAUSE. Not really. Just hold your questions."

Frakkakhan was forced to jump in, "Death to FLOTSAM if you don't shut up and let my esteemed colleague speak!" FLOTSAM shut the hell up because as good little socialists, they know a real threat when they see it. Frakkakhan continued. "That's better. As you were saying, Dear 'anonymous androgynous ambisexual gender fluid studies' Leader?"

"Thank you, Lou-Lou. We need to talk about your shoes later. Niiiice. I assume they are not real leather? Oh, they are OLD leather. Then that is okay. But let me finish with my statement: We stand before you today. In all our fluid genders. EXCEPT. For actual females because they are trying to steal the thunder of Lou-Lou and our transgender friends who do not have a real vagina and who hate America and Jews. But basically what I want to say is — Lou-Lou is so brilliant in his oratory — 'What he said'."

The fawning press corps were left holding mics, shoulder-mounted cameras, and unasked questions as the anonymous androgynous ambisexual gender fluid studies leader and Lou-Lou, surrounded by armed guards that looked 100% male (Lawzuh MURZEE!), left in an armor-plated limo owned by The Little People LLC, a non-profit organization that serves to keep all children safe except for the ones who stubbornly insist they are 100% of a single gender/sex, also known as what God called male and female.



** FLOTSAM means For Liberal Opinion That is Serious and Actually Matters

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Sunday, November 18, 2018

Loving greenery more than loving people.

by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World
Which is worse: To love trees and bushes so much that people die? Or to manage the trees and bushes and save human lives, homes, businesses, schools, etc.? This poem written in 1895 sums up the California fire situation wherein Governor Moonbeam is praised for saving leaves and letting people die while Donald Trump is being called bad names — yet again — for pointing out a sensible solution that is used by many others to great benefit.


The Fence or the Ambulance
JOHN N. HURTY, M.D.
'Twas a dangerous cliff, as they freely confessed,
Though to walk near its crest was so pleasant.
But over its terrible edge there had slipped
A duke and full many a peasant.
So the people said something would have to be done,
But their projects did not at all tally,
Some said, ' Put a fence 'round the edge of the cliff';
Some, 'An ambulance down in the valley.'


But the cry for the ambulance carried the day,
For it spread through the neighboring city;
A fence may be useful or not, it is true,
But each heart was brim full of pity
For those who slipped over that dangerous cliff;
And the dwellers in highway and valley
Gave pound or gave pence, not to put up a fence,
But an ambulance down in the valley.


For the cliff is all right if you're careful,' they said,
'And if folks even slip or are dropping,
It isn't the slipping that hurts them so much
As the shock down below when they're stopping.'
Then an old sage remarked, 'It's a marvel to me
That people give far more attention
To repairing results than to stopping the cause,
When they'd much better aim at prevention.


'Let us stop at its source all this mischief,' cried he,
' Come, neighbors and friends, let us rally,
If the cliff we will fence we might almost dispense
With the ambulance down in the valley.'


'Oh, he's a fanatic,' the others rejoined.

'Dispense with the ambulance? Never!
He'd dispense with all charities, too, if he could;
But no! We'll protect them forever;
Aren't we picking folks up just as fast as they fall?
And shall this man dictate to us? Shall he?
Why should people of sense stop to put up a fence
While their ambulance works in the valley?'

But a sensible few who were practical, too,
Will not bear with such nonsense much longer,
They believe that prevention is better than cure
And their party will soon be the stronger.
Encourage them, then, with your purse, voice and pen,
And (while other philanthropists dally)
They will scorn all pretense and put up a stout fence
On the cliff that hangs over the valley.


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Saturday, November 17, 2018

Public Service Announcement: National Unfriend Day

This is a public service announcement from your Citizen Journalist, Angela K. Durden, also known as The Most Brilliant Woman In The World:

Unfriending in this manner is NOT the best way 
to end 99.99999999995% of relationships.*


Written and composed and sung 
by your Citizen Journalist, 
and songwriter, 
Angela K. Durden.
Alan Dynin on piano.
Ted Pettus on harpoon.
Share with your peeps.


*Please be advised your Citizen Journalist, Angela K. Durden, also known as The Most Brilliant Woman In The World, is not here advocating for any particular murder, nor does this statement endorse the efficacy of any particular method of murder. In other words, easy death or hard, she makes no opinion. She is, however, simply stating a fact and which is that sometimes somebody's gonna die for good cause. Novelists, those who write fiction, rely upon this fact when coming up with their plot points. If you would like to read an extremely good example of this writing method, please click here and buy this book.

Monday, November 12, 2018

A Poem for the Current Socio-Political Climate.


At it again...all for you.

by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World
Business writer.  Songwriter.  Protecting creator's copyrights. 



Two wittle wadies hurlin' insults in a twee.
Why oh why do dey
compwain abou' me?

Dey compwain and compwain. Dey don'
know what else to say.
Dey beweeve deys feewings 'portant, so dey
whine dey days away.


But I's not so woowied 'bout
dey words and such.
I's jezz hope dat branch holds 'cuz
I's don' hab a cwutch.



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Sunday, November 11, 2018

In honor of National Singles Day

This is a public service announcement from your Citizen Journalist, Angela K. Durden, also known as The Most Brilliant Woman In The World:
Good day to you, Singles. 
One assumes that if you are single by choice, you will not want to listen to the song below. 

However, if you are single by force of circumstance (whatever those are), then this song might be for you and you will totally relate. 



Written and composed and sung 
by your Citizen Journalist, 
and songwriter, 
Angela K. Durden.


Remember:
Ending a relationship in the manner as heard in the song below 
is NOT the best way to end 99.99999999995% of relationships.*

Written and composed and sung 
by your Citizen Journalist, 
and songwriter, 
Angela K. Durden.
Alan Dynin on piano.
Ted Pettus on harpoon.
Share with your peeps.


*Please be advised your Citizen Journalist, Angela K. Durden, also known as The Most Brilliant Woman In The World, is not here advocating for any particular murder, nor does this statement endorse the efficacy of any particular method of murder. In other words, easy death or hard, she makes no opinion. She is, however, simply stating a fact and which is that sometimes somebody's gonna die for good cause. Novelists, those who write fiction, rely upon this fact when coming up with their plot points. If you would like to read an extremely good example of this writing method, please click here and buy this book.



Tuesday, October 30, 2018

Cold Spaghetti, Moon, and Solar Winds.


At it again...all for you.


by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World
Business writer.  Songwriter.  Protecting creator's copyrights. 

I like cold spaghetti. Let me restate: I love it. The crisp tang of the tomato sauce over cold noodles makes my taste buds stand up and cheer. 

When it is dark and the cicadas and tree frogs and owls are chirping, croaking, and hooting in the first cool night heralding Fall, my balcony is a fine place to be.

Which is another way of saying that this particular evening was a fine way to end the day.

Standing on the balcony, I looked up and saw the moon. At first I thought I was seeing things and so squinted my newly awakened eyes to get them to focus. But what I saw remained.

There was a bluish haze swirling around the moon. It wasn't clouds in the earth's atmosphere playing a trick because the haze remained at the moon's edges. What was it? The pattern and swirl looked familiar and that is when I remembered why it was familiar. It looked somewhat like the Aurora Borealis light display produced by solar winds.

And here, against the night sky, the full moon was putting on a show of its own. With barely any atmosphere and only 1.2% of the Earth's gravity, solar winds can kick up mighty big dust storms on the moon.

Standing on the balcony, cold spaghetti momentarily forgotten, I watched the solar winds ever-changing in their flow and ebb until dark storm clouds pushed in, hiding the moon from view. 

Those who watch the skies are having too much fun. If they add cold spaghetti to their viewings, they will be in heaven.


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Scaring Millenials? I doubt it.

At it again...all for you.

by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World
Business writer.  Songwriter.  Protecting creator's copyrights. 

Pay special attention to this ad at the very end. Besides showing a bunch of old white people saying things that, according to popular thought, only rich conservatives would say, the end features a graphic showing President Trump being pounded in the head as "Knock the Vote" plays on the screen. Now, I don't mind comedy. And I certainly do not mind showing a politician being bopped or doing the bopping. That is part of the history of political cartooning. We've seen it before. 

What I do mind, though, is the group Acronym believing that any Millenial anywhere is going to pay attention to old white people in the first place. Millenials have been trained to tune out old white people — even when they use words like "fuck". I mean, look how much they are going to Robert de Niro's movies these days and he said "Fuck Trump"...on air...several times. But did Millenials pay attention?

They did not because they don't see old white people. So how could an ad full of old white people scare Millenials into voting? Wasted effort.

So, I believe that Acronym is pulling a fast one on whoever paid for these ads. I believe Acronym is actually owned and run by conservative types who have taken the money of liberal types by convincing the liberal types that this will work.


The plan is brilliant! Talk about being a double agent, Acronym. Kudos. 




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Sunday, October 28, 2018

I AM ISRAEL


At it again...all for you.

by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World
Business writer.  Songwriter.  Protecting creator's copyrights. 


On Friday, October 26, 2018, a woman asked me what the new book (available in about a week) I AM ISRAEL — Lions and Lambs of the Land by Jedwin Smith was all about. I told her it was about what was really happening in Israel, the never-ending fight to remain a nation engaged in since 1948, and the surprising parties who have led and funded attacks against them. 

She asked why it was so important to know these things. My answer? "As Israel goes, so goes the rest of the world." 

Another woman shrugged off the suggestion and actually had some derogatory things to say about Christians. It was weird. I only hope they remembered what I said, though, because the next day, Saturday, October 27, 2018, Robert D. Bowers walked into the Tree of Life Congregation, a Jewish synagogue in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, and opened fire. He killed 11 congregants and wounded several first responders. His publicly stated reason: He hates Jews. He has demonized them. And that is good enough reason for them to die. He believes he has done nothing wrong. 

Around the world, one can hear Jews and Christians intone "never again" when they speak of the World War II Holocaust that killed 6 million Jews and 5.5 million of other religions, beliefs, and other categories of undesirables according to the Nazi SS and Adolf Hitler. 

But "never again" makes the implied promise that those who remember, and those who know history, will do their utmost to speak up, and do something about it, when they see the same situation growing again. 

Remember the poem that begins "First they came for [this group], but I did not speak up because I was not [this group]?" It ends when "they" come for "him", but no one is left to speak up. 

"They" can be any group, anywhere, at any time, that seeks power for selfish means through a manipulation of the law, public opinion, media, and political process. No two ways about it: "They" are always evil. "They" always seek to take power and freedom out of the hands of citizens. "They" have no compunctions about inciting violence, breaking promises, or flat out lying.

Unfortunately, many Jews and most Christians do not understand what it means to keep the implied promise of "never again." We often find Jews and Christians supporting goals the evil "They" are touting and we have to ask, "Why?"

Slogans do not win wars and, for most, "never again" became a mere slogan a long time ago. A slogan that makes a person feel good when they say it with emotion, but a slogan without action to back it up is meaningless. 

It takes great courage to call out Evil when Evil wears a smile and throws a party and everybody at the party hoots and hollers at you to shut up because you're being mean. But Evil knows a real opponent when it sees one. Look Evil in the eye and you will see a believer in truth because Evil recognizes the truth of his opponents' resolve. 

In Smith's book I AM ISRAEL, you will find out why the people of the land — yes Jews, Believers, and Arabs whether Muslim or Christian — understand the implied promise in "never again" and fight to keep that promise for freedom. Radicals of every faith can be found throughout that land and surrounding countries. Every single one of them want to destroy anybody who supports freedom. These radicals are funded by sources that will surprise those who do not understand what the real issue is.

The real issue is freedom. Those who do not understand that are clueless. They not only do not speak up, the clueless thinks uttering weak slogans like "Give peace a chance" and "We just need to love each other" will solve the problem. As if peace and love haven't been given a chance! 

These slogans are meaningless. 
They are useless against Evil.
Evil will never give peace and love a chance. 
Evil bares teeth and rips the guts out of the clueless.

Until God's Kingdom by His Son Jesus Christ begins its rule, and once and for all time fulfills the promise of "never again", it is up to humans to keep that promise as best they can. But they cannot do it with slogans. They cannot do it without knowing the truth of why so many people believe it is a-okay to kill Jews and Christians or anyone else with impunity. 

We who have met Evil up close and personal are who must speak up when Evil is doing its damnedest to destroy freedom.

Make no mistake. This attack on the Jewish synagogue in Pittsburgh was meant to "put Jews in their place" and make them scared so they will quit and give in to Evil. It was also meant to hush up anybody else who didn't go along. 

This is the very same thing the citizens of the nation of Israel — Jewish, Believers, and Arabs — go through every day. Yet, around the world, Israel is portrayed in the press as the aggressor when all they are doing is keeping the promise of "never again."

As Israel goes, so goes the rest of the world. 



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Tuesday, October 23, 2018

Can't find solution until you know the motivation.


At it again...all for you.

by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World
Business writer.  Songwriter.  Protecting creator's copyrights. 

The WashingtonPost.com's Brian Fung asked the question: Is Goo-Goo-Goo and Bacefook too powerful?

Short answer: Yes.
Long answer: But, why?

When seeking growth, many businesses set market share goals. For instance, let's say you have four manufacturers of Class 8 trucks (long haul tractors that pull loaded trailers).

Four dealerships in a city represent one each of different manufacturers. 

Each dealer and manufacturer know how many trucks sold last year within their market reach or are on order for the coming five years within that same area. But the orders are not enough to keep the plants running and people employed, nor are they enough to satisfy investors' expectations of returns. So what does Manufacturer do?

Manufacturer sends their goal-supporting sales expectations to Dealer who, using reports available from the government and other data services, is required to find potential new sales within their predefined market area and report back to Manufacturer. If Manufacturer does not like Dealer's Sales Plan, they pitch a fit. Dealer then "tweaks" their numbers to get Manufacturer to shut up so they can get busy sussing out new business. 

But the Internet is different. 

From the beginning Small Business and individuals were told they no longer had to rely on what was physically around them to sell. Yes, Small Business and Individuals, your market reach was no longer finite. You could sell to the world. All one had to do was have this nifty little thing called a URL then build a website and somehow magically search engines would make the business seen by everybody. And it worked that way for a while. 

Let's take Amazon as just one example. I heard about this thing called Amazon Advantage for Small Publishers. I had published a book. I needed a wider audience to purchase it. My book went up, product was shipped to Amazon from which they fulfilled orders; and it sold pretty good for one year.

I kept my end of the agreement, too. I was selling hot and heavy into library systems across the U.S.* Then Amazon went public and that book's physical inventory disappeared though the website said it was still available for purchase. Where I could call and talk to my rep before, now I couldn't get a live person to save my soul. Online sales of that book were over. 

What I experienced was the first of Big Tech's bites into controlling my market reach which limited my market share and there was nothing I could do about it. 

From friendly search engines simply indexing available content so that seeking searchers could use Boolean phrases to find what they wanted, these were quickly eclipsed by Goo-Goo-Goo offering easier searching without the Boolean language and supplied, O! Happy Days!, neat gadgets to use on your computer that were Fun! and Helpful! and Efficient! Of course, they also began to control which search returns showed up first and Your's Could Be One For a Fee!

Death to the other search engines...or if they wanted to live, they had to pull their feed from The Big G and the web became even stronger for The Big G. [In response to that autocratic control came the rise of the Dark Web.] Soon, the only way to get an ad on the Internet was to pay The Big G. And if they did not like your company (let's say it was a possible competitor) or your opinion, your ad was either buried or The Big G blocked you from buying an ad, best case, or worst case: Blocked you from having your opinion seen. 

You can repeat this scenario with Bacefook Ads and Twitless, too. 

The question, though, is why?

Why was it so important for The Big G and social media companies to have that much control?

Simple: They have an agenda and that agenda is a One World Government run by them and for them.

We know this because the United Nations has always had that same agenda and have been quietly (as far as the public knows about it) yet overtly funding and supporting goals of terrorist organizations in order to keep the world unbalanced so that regular folks will be calling for a solution and they can get back to living their lives in peace and security. 

And who will be in a good position to step in to deliver that peace and security? The United Nations, of course, and its handmaidens du jour, Big Tech.

You think I jest. 

I do not. And if they could deliver on it, then yay for everybody. The problem, though, is that they themselves are manipulated by Satan, and by Satan I do not mean The Great Satan as the United States of America is defined by Radical Muslims. I mean Satan the Devil, Almighty God's arch nemesis who, from almost the very first get-go has wanted control to be his and not God's, and who has used lies, terror, and manipulation to get it. The United Nations and Big Tech are merely another of Satan's tools to continue his war against good people and God and His Son.

"Now, Angela, aren't you just being a little bit naive here?"

That would be a big no. In fact, to think otherwise is to be naive and leaves one open to being constantly jerked around. The Bible talks of these things. I've studied the book for many years. But there is good news: Satan via the United Nations and whichever handmaidens du jour they use, will not be successful. In fact, they will fail spectacularly.

So, while I might find it nearly impossible to have an online business or to get my writings out in front of a wider audience, I know I am not alone in this fight. And what solutions get pushed out will not work if the real reason for the existence of the problem is not accurately defined. 

In other words, just because a doctor thinks you have a broken arm, doesn't mean it is. So if he treats a broken arm but it is your foot that got chopped off, what good is the cast?




* The book was so helpful it kept getting stolen from libraries until finally the libraries said they were not going to reorder anymore. Also, one of my distributors went out of business at the same time. Another simply changed their name and moved to God-knows-where stealing my stock. 

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Saturday, October 20, 2018

One cannot wave a weenie; one can only waggle it.


At it again...all for you.


by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World


John and Lorena Bobbitt would say this is a misleading headline. I prefer to say it does not address all instances of penile usage, abuse, or assault.

If you do not know who these people are, let me say they made worldwide headlines after John woke to find Lorena waving his disattached weenie as she held it aloft in one hand and a sharp knife in the other. One can infer she was gloating. As John was not in a position to give chase[1], Lorena ran out the door, jumped in her car, threw it in gear, and hauled ass…I mean, hauled penis…down the highway in a fit of jubilant exultation that she would not have to touch that man’s dick ever again. When she realized she was still holding it, she threw it out the window.

At some point she called 911 and that’s when the story went viral before the Internet was as big a deal as it is now and before viral stories were a thing that could be planned using Google AdWords[2]. I won’t even go into how his severed man part was found and reattached in a nine-plus hour surgery. 

Nor shall I mention that his reattached part never regained full sensation or that to pay his medical bills John started and failed with a band called The Severed Parts or that he was a featured actor in a few adult films or that he ended up beating up a girlfriend or that he appeared on the World Wrestling Federation‘s Monday Night Raw television program or that he worked as a bartender, limo driver, mover, pizza delivery driver, tow-truck operator, thief, and wife beater or that he served at a wedding chapel as a minister of a Universal Life Church or that in 2014 he was severely injured when he broke his neck because none of that matters. 

What matters is that this headline is accurate as written because I am discussing another instance altogether. Here’s what happened.


There was this man, Justice Brett Kavanaugh, who was accused by a professor, Christine Blasey Ford, of trying to rape her. The falseness of her accusation aside, “We Believe Her” became the slogan of the #MeToo day. What was interesting is that in one news report a screaming pussy-hat wearing person[3] was holding a sign that said

IT IS ILLEGAL TO WAVE A WEENIE IN THE FACE.

At which point, in public, flew out of my mouth the words, “One cannot wave a weenie, one can only waggle it.”

All the men around me blushed. All the women nodded at my sage wisdom. We women know weenies cannot wave. Weenies can say “Heybebbiewhuzzzyername?” Weenies can take the Dance Floor Dick Test. But they cannot wave when they are attached. It just cannot happen. Look, if a weenie is waving, it is of no use to a woman. Obviously, it is only Real Women who know this. But you see how these pussy-hat wearing people just cannot deal with real facts. 

They wouldn’t know a real fact if it waved in their faces.



[1] It is doubtful he even spoke, but if he did he would’ve said, “Woman! Give it back!”

[2] Unless you are blacklisted by Google.

[3] Future archeologists and anthropologists will tell you I am not lying. While the pussy-hat wearing person looked female, what with the fuzzy lines at the time around gender and some folks passing as everything but what they were born as, the author cannot say for certain this person was female though she dang sure looked like it in the face. The sign covered the chest area and even if it hadn’t and bumps could be seen, who was to say those bumps were natural-made, surgical enhancement, or it was a guy who liked to smoke his wacky weed.

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Monday, October 15, 2018

Wednesday Morning Meeting of the Sisterhood of Coffee Society


At it again...all for you.


by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World
Business writer.  Songwriter.  Protecting creator's copyrights. 


For some months I've been meeting a couple of friends once a week at 7:30 AM for a hot cuppa and flour-based edibles at an independent coffee shop about a half mile from where I live. I am now considered one of the regular crowd that shuffles in. 

Of course I walk to and from the place come rain, shine, fog, heat, or cold. It's a way to get the blood pumping and the muscles to say Hello, World!

There is a fellow — folks say he is a professor at Emory — that shows up around the time the shop opens and camps out at the exact same spot each day. My friends know him. He smiles at them. They smile back. They chat to him. He chats back. He laughs at what other people say and they wave to him and he waves back. A regularly nice fellow according to all outward indications. 

Anyway, my friends introduced me and I said hello. He simply stared, said nothing, looked me up and down like I was not worth his time, then averted his eyes and refused to acknowledge me further. Then he made copious notes on a yellow legal pad. 

My friends were dumbfounded. "Huh," they said. "That's odd. Hey, Angela, wonder why he did that? He's always been so friendly."

However, it dawned on me after a few weeks of this that he could have identified me as a subject of an anthropological study of some sort and, as week after week I went about trying varied approaches to get a different response, he was treating me the exact same way — with disdain — and making observational notations of The Most Brilliant Woman In The World. 

Yes, ladies and germs (see video below for this phrase used in a historical context by Dewey Cox), it is clear the subject of a long-term study of your Citizen Journalist and The Most Brilliant Woman In The World is being conducted in the wild.

So I decided to make him a subject of my study. 

Each week hence I've tried different approaches to the situation to see if he changes toward me. He remains the same to everybody else including my friends — interactive in a friendly fashion. But no matter what I do — smile, frown, speak or not, wave or not, wear clothes or not (just kidding!) — he stares, says nothing, looks at me like I'm trash, averts his eyes, tries to finish his coffee with a shudder while I am in the same room, and takes more notes. 

I have not yet reached my conclusions about him and so the study results are not yet ready for publication. You know what? I'm lying. I have totally reached a conclusion about him.

I remind him of his mother and he love/hates her and she's dessicating in a rocking chair in a room on the third floor of his family-owned motel and he's wondering how to get me in the shower so he can use his carefully sharpened knife on me but his frustration grows because he has a suspicion — and a highly accurate one because he isn't stupid — that I'd shoot him before he even got close.

Yes, boys and girls, welcome to my world. 

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