Wednesday, August 15, 2018

Your Pig Latin Rap O'da Day #1

At it again...all for you.

by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World

You see what I do for you? I scour these here Dubya-Budya-Dubya Internets to bring you stuff like this.

Friday, August 10, 2018

Where do story ideas come from? Well, let me tell you.

What is Angela up to now?
by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World

What follows are first lines from a random selection of books off my shelves. Shall I weave them into a story? If the answer is yes, email me at or reply to this posting with a big fat YES! 

  • Two very beautiful naked girls are crouched facing each other. 
  • In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.
  • Franklin Fletcher dreamed of luxury in the form of tiger-skins and beautiful women.
  • We keep contucci di Prato stocked in the bar at all times.
  • Without warning, in the middle of the thirties, I had a breakdown of nerve.
  • The man in gray decided to take the Glen Suite of diamonds at midnight.
  • A man with a wooden leg walked along a hospital corridor.
  • “Wouldn’t you like to go to church with me tomorrow morning?”
  • In Whitfield, Nebraska, there are only three bars.
  • You were born and were a happy child.
  • Many survival case histories show that stubborn, strong willpower can conquer many obstacles. 
  • George had always been a carefree person — or so he thought — until that afternoon in early October.
  • Aliens suck at music.
  • At one minute out, the Black Hawk crew chief slid the door open.
  • Not so long ago, menopause was a word you did not say out loud in public.
  • Why did he do it?
  • Homicide investigation is a profound duty.
  • Either this will ring bells for you, or it won’t.
  • Being a lawyer is hard enough, but being a lawyer who from time to time writes sassy and irreverent commentary for the newspapers is to subject one’s self to flaying on two fronts.
  • The Pilates method of body conditioning is a unique system of stretching and strengthening exercises developed over ninety years ago by Joseph H. Pilates.
  • On an October Sunday afternoon, Jack Taft, innocently unaware that he was marked for death, sat slumped in Singapore Airlines’ first-class lounge. 
  • Two young men on horseback.
  • The house was a disaster.
  • At airports, train stations, sporting events, and just about anywhere Americans congregate in significant numbers, signs posted by the Department of Homeland Security urge, “If you see something, say something.”
  • Frank Borman brought three Russian cosmonauts and their interpreter to see Dolly.
  • What matters?


Wednesday, August 8, 2018

You mean free speech doesn't end because somebody is uncomfortable?

At it again...all for you.

by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World
Business writer.  Songwriter.  Protecting creator's copyrights. 

What does a t-shirt about the border wall on the bottom side of the U.S. have to do with black arm bands protesting the Vietnam War?

In both instances, one from about 50 years ago and one from 2018, the courts ruled that free speech is a right granted students in school. Even after passing through the schoolhouse gates and with P-HWPCDLRSFCs* saying that speech caused them to be offended.

So, yay for those students who spoke up and yay for those judges who said the young man's lawsuit in Oregon had merit and that it would proceed which, of course, made the school district rethink its position on how much money they were willing to throw at the case. They covered his legal expenses to date and the principal wrote a letter of apology to the young fella who brought a political statement t-shirt to a political discussion class.

I remember my first brush with Socialism in the school [Tetherball: My First Brush with Socialism.] and how angry it made me at the time. Still, Miss Chapman didn't realize she was pushing a Socialist agenda because, more than likely, she had received the first round of Fairness Training as the Commies in power in the teacher schools began rolling out their long-term plan for dumbing down the U.S. population with the Socialist Caring Doctrine, and it all sounded so warm and fuzzy and how could that possibly be bad, right?

Socialism is so much more warmer sounding than communism which is why most Socialists in power are Communists, but both ideologies hurt equally bad. Tomato, toemahtoe, it's all the same bloody red mess when government bullets start flying against innocent citizenry after their guns have been outlawed and impounded.

I've always pushed back against Socialism and Communism, I don't care which brand of clothes they claim to wear. Anybody try to force me to show I'm in support of or against a thing or else they will punish me, then I'm all over their asses with a lesson of my own. 

So, to the Addison Barnes in other high schools who have been told they have no right to free speech while they are in schools Elementary, High, or Higher, I say, "Kudos to you. Isn't it nice to get your spine back?"

Please understand, though, that a court's protection of free speech rights does not make the opinion of the speaker valid, and that is where a lot of people get confused. They think if they have the right to say it, then they are right.

That is not true. Getting or giving pushback. Starting or joining a discussion. Finding what works and identifying what does not. That's what free speech is all about and that is why the Middle East and the former Soviet block and some cities and states in the U.S. are having such a difficult time: They believe in free speech only for themselves and they will shut up any dissenting voices.

Just ask bakers of cakes about being shut up and shut down for standing up for their rights to free speech.


P-HWPCDLRSFC is Pussy-Hat Wearing Politically Correct Democrat Liberal RINO Socialist Fascist Commies.

Friday, August 3, 2018

Paper or plastic?

At it again...all for you.

by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World
Business writer.  Songwriter.  Protecting creator's copyrights. 

The cashier helpfully pointed and asked, "Paper or plastic?" 

"Paper or plastic what?" I replied as I turned attention from my children who were about to kick each other's asses in the grocery checkout.

She pointed again. "Bags. Paper or plastic?" 

"Plastic!" I cried out in joy because these bags were the same size as my little trashcans around the house and all I could think was, "Ha! Saving money."

And for the next thirty years I was not asked that question until I moved to Decatur, Georgia, a place one cannot turn around in twice without bumping against a P-HWPCDLRSFC*.

Now when I get asked paper or plastic, I know where I better say paper, or else, brethren, the environmental gods will rain disapproval down upon my head. 

Ah, what a difference three decades can make. A complete 180° turn and yet the piousness has not left the room. 

To bring you up to date, you might want to read what I wrote HERE about the recent plastic straw ban in Santa Barbara. But do you see the problem? Everybody used to use paper straws, then plastic came in because they lasted longer, were sturdier, and so forth and for seven decades made the tree huggers happy because it SAVED TREES. Now the tides they be a-turning.

However, the real reason for this column is that I have to ask the P-HWPCDLRSFC* how it is they can recommend, or force use of by law, of anything? 

If they use paper products, a TREE DIES!
If they use metal products, the SKY DIES!
If they use leather, a precious COW DIES!
If they use plastic products, the EARTH DIES!
If they use electricity, the CLIMATE DIES!

How can they wipe their boohiney, blow their nose, change a tire, clean their car, make use of life-saving medical procedures, and a host of other things I know all these folks do? 

What does the current Santa Barbara plastic straw ban tell us? It tells us that there is more than one kind of environmental wa-...errrr...I mean — you know, I'm just gonna say it — wackjob, and that they are all shortsighted hypocrites.

We should soon be seeing Pro-Paper P-HWPCDLRSFC* marching against Pro-Metal P-HWPCDLRSFC*. Oh, the fun. I can see it now.

Both sides show up in the same uniform — pussy hats and "Execute Trump!" signs  — and they stand around hurling insults at the sky because they can't tell who is for paper straws and which is for metal.

Hmmmm...maybe not so much fun after all...unless the Pro-Leather doms and dommettes show up.

But I bet #CrunkNewsNetwork will manage to turn the pussy-hat fest into a cause célèbre what with their great ability to use misleading figures and tight camera shots and their willingness to have a stand-up reporter have a hand in making up fake news. 

P-HWPCDLRSFC is Pussy-Hat Wearing Politically Correct Democrat Liberal RINO Socialist Fascist Commies
** FLOTSAM means For Liberal Opinion That is Serious and Actually Matters


Thursday, August 2, 2018

Knock-Knock-Knocking on Your Front Door: The Straw Schutzstaffel

At it again...all for you.

by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World
First they came for straws in a restaurant. What's next?
Breaking down doors and pointing guns at kids while straws are snatched from their mouths and they see their parents hauled off to the gulag?

Boys and girls, I am all for looking after the environment, but how one goes about it is usually the problem. Get gubment P-HWPCLDRSFCs* involved and see how that turns out. I shall say just five words that will tell you all you need to know:

Prohibition. The War On Drugs.

That's right. Starting in 1920, alcohol, or as we say here in the South: alkeeHAUL, became illegal to drink, produce, transport, or sell. Thirteen years and many deaths at the hands of the new gangs running the rum later, somebody called a halt to that silliness.

Then the nation and a whole heap of the rest of the world got distracted from alkeeHAUL what with fighting Fascism, Socialism, and Communism, and what not so that, come 1971, President Richard Nixon, who never broke a law in his life**, ended the Vietnam War and started another.

The War On Drugs is still going on here in 2018, 34 years longer than the ban on the demon drink. This silliness is still going on.

Even Donald "The Hammer" Trump, who is himself not a partaker of drugs and drink, is agreeing The War On Drugs is out of hand. After Kim Kardashian West gave him some information on one casualty of this war, "The Hammer" looked into it.

He then commuted the sentence of one Alice Marie Johnson who had one — count it: ONE!  — tiny non-violent drug offense and had been sentenced to life without possibility of parole. Now that it looks like this war is ending, though, P-HWPCLDRSFC, who claim they do not like war, have now started —

The War On Straws.

One can only assume the City Council of Santa Barbara, California, featuring Cathy, Jason, Randy, Oscar, Kristen, Eric, and Gregg (see complete names and mailing addresses below) have nothing better to do than start The War On Straws. You think I jest? Ha. Look at just some of the official language they have released. Please note: Like all sneaky grabbers of power do, they upped the ante. I excerpt pertinent parts:

This ordinance shall take effect on the 31st day following its adoption, but shall not become operative until 2:01 a.m. on January 1, 2019. 
9.165.030 Sale or Distribution of Plastic Beverage Straws Prohibited. A. It shall be unlawful for any food provider or beverage provider to use plastic beverage straws, or to provide, distribute, or sell plastic beverage straws to any person. B....Non-plastic alternative straws shall only be provided upon request. C....
Of course, the first to be in big trouble with the S-SS, or Straw Schutzstaffel, will be the servers. Everybody knows how hard it is to keep that ever-rotating group trained. Brave and brilliant business owners, already under a massive amount of government regulation and yet manage to somehow keep the lights on, employ others, and make a profit, will be the next targeted group.
9.165.040 Upon Request Provision of Plastic Cutlery or Stirrers. It shall be unlawful for any beverage provider or food provider to provide plastic cutlery or plastic stirrers...: (1) the beverage provider or food provider first asks that person whether they want to receive..., or (2) the customer affirmatively requests....
The KGB has to be laughing their asses off as they make fun of the undercover CIA operatives at their cocktail parties. But it gets worse. As P-HWPCLDRSFC care so much, their next provision for lawful use of plastic straws involves government-approved emergency response teams and...

Hold on to your hats...
C....3. The food provider or beverage provider provides, distributes, or sells a plastic beverage straw to a person for whom non-plastic alternatives are unsuitable due to a mental or physical condition that qualifies as a disability pursuant to the Americans with Disabilities Act (42 USC § 12102).
Holy cow. Now the City Council of Santa Barbara wants servers to ask for proof that somebody qualifies as disabled before they can get a damn plastic straw?

All that proves is the P-HWPCLDRSFC are into dividing people into classes based on weaknesses instead of allowing everyone to go with their strengths.

What say you? 

Shall we send the City of Santa Barbara, Kal-I-Forn-Eye-Aye, a packet of straws for each member of the City Council. I did not see where it was against The War On Straws to receive straws as a gift, though I well imagine that redo of the ordinance language will follow shortly upon the Council members' receivership of the nations' gifts.

Should you decide to send straws, please address your packages to:

City Hall
Attn: Council Member recipient name here.
735 Anacapa Street
Santa Barbara, CA 93101

Shall we say, one package each for the following? Mayor Cathy Murillo, and other Council members Jason Dominquez, Randy Rowse, Oscar Gutierrez, Kristen Sneddon, Eric Friedman, and Gregg Hart.

P-HWPCDLRSFC is Pussy-Hat Wearing Politically Correct Democrat Liberal RINO Socialist Fascist Commies
** You will have surmised major comedic irony in this statement, right?


Wednesday, August 1, 2018

Public Service Announcement: National Girlfriend's Day

This is a public service announcement from your Citizen Journalist, Angela K. Durden, also known as The Most Brilliant Woman In The World:

In the real world, this is NOT the best way 
to end 99.99999999995% of relationships.*

Written and composed and sung 
by your Citizen Journalist, 
and songwriter, 
Angela K. Durden.
Alan Dynin on piano.
Ted Pettus on harpoon.
Share with your peeps.

*Please be advised your Citizen Journalist, Angela K. Durden, also known as The Most Brilliant Woman In The World, is not here advocating for any particular murder, nor does this statement endorse the efficacy of any particular method of murder. In other words, easy death or hard, she makes no opinion. She is, however, simply stating a fact and which is that sometimes somebody's gonna die for good cause. Novelists, those who write fiction, rely upon this fact when coming up with their plot points. If you would like to read an extremely good example of this writing method, please click here and buy this book.

Saturday, July 28, 2018

Answering a Pussy-Hat Wearing Commie.

At it again...all for you. 

by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World

Well, Jennifer, one thing everybody is worried about is the next world war. [See Bacefook thread screenshot below that made this response happen.] If you are not worried about that, then you are in the minority. So we have the two biggest powers on earth who have the most nuclear and other types of weapons.

Of those two, one is out of control and has shown they have no problem going into countries and stomping them flat with illegal invasions because publicly they tout as their goal world domination and turning it all communist, denying freedoms, and destroying faiths, and raping the land and the people as commies are wont to do.

The second country is not interested in world domination, but they are interested in solidifying freedoms for all and are willing to stand up to bullies who push them and their other freedom-loving friends around.

Therefore, with the commie country and their buddies the ChiComs and the U.N., pushing to destroy freedoms around the world, and given their combined histories of human rights violations, mass murders, genocides in the millions, and so forth, you can bet their goal is to make their biggest and strongest enemy weak — which they have been working on since before the end of World War II — so that when they make their move to take over, their enemy will have no strength of will to fight back.

Last thought: I am not oversimplifying. I am seeing current events in the light of history which, of course, means I am doomed to watching history repeat itself if the axiom holds true.


Friday, July 27, 2018

It's Drink O'Clock: Benjamin Orr Band - Candy-O

"California DMV worker slept on the job for three years, audit says."

At it again...all for you.

by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World
Business writer.  Songwriter.  Protecting creator's copyrights. 

The above title of this column is the actual headline and directly quoted by your Citizen Journalist from The Sacramento Bee.

I find it ironic — is it ironic I find this or just plain funny? Let me think on that a minute or two whilst I get myself a cuppa. Be right back.






... I am back and have made my conclusion.

I find it both ironic and funny that a self-professed Socialist state here in the U.S. — one which prides itself on, and claims inclusion of everybody — have set up an Auditing Department for government workers in that Socialist state and are complaining about a woman who needs her sleep. 

Besides, everybody in the world knows, and it is a given, that workers for socialist, authoritarian, dictatorship, and communist governments have as their first operational rule: Stick it to the man and try to get away with it as long as possible.

Does nobody remember the phone in the hospital alcove in "The Russia House"? No? Well, damn. So let me tell you about it. See, there was this phone in a hospital that seems the Commie Russkis had forgotten all about. So folks never told the gubment about it so that they could use the phone to make free long-distance phone calls. The phone figured prominently in several scenes of daring-do spy drama. But let's get back to that other Socialist State. 

And what of the poor little DMV worker who slept three hours a day? She even brought a doctor's excuse and they still included her in the Audit of Socialist Government Workers Gone Wild.

The article also included others who were "Sticking it to the man" like a fire chief who had two of his guys build him a tiki hut party room at the back of a house he rented from the State. The chief did not get building permits and so the State tore it down. And a woman who had a friend hire her for a second job for which she was overqualified. This one was confusing because supposedly she showed up for the second job but got other people to do her first job. I don't know. Leave it to the gubment's Department of Audit of Socialist Government Workers Gone Wild to not tell us the whole story. 

Speaking of Russians and General Patton's version of detenté, here is a video you might like:


Thursday, July 26, 2018

Biggest child sex-tourism country in the world complains about foreign media.

At it again...all for you.

by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World

The one country in the world that is most well-known for child sex-tourism is complaining that the foreign media behaved irresponsibly by interviewing the boys who had been stuck in a cave for two weeks.

Behaved irresponsibly? Yes, Thailand said the foreign press did not treat the children as fragile and protect their psyches because there was no psychologist present during the interview.

I saw the coverage and read news stories about the event. Seems to me the foreign press was celebrating the fact that these boys would live to see another day. How is that irresponsible?

You want to talk irresponsible? The coach who said it was a good idea to go into a cave that was known for quickly flooding during a sprinkle. Or the country that knows — KNOWS, DAMN IT! — that toddlers are being kept in captivity to sell "yum-yum" services to men who travel from other countries to have their dicks sucked by a child because they might get caught and put in prison if they did that same thing in their home country.

Oh, am I being irresponsible in mentioned that so crudely?

Well, boo hoo, Thailand. But, hey, we see you got your national priorities straight, don't we? That's right. Keep them tourism dollars coming and ignore the fragile nature of your young sex workers and continue to pound on their fragile psyches every damn day.


Tuesday, July 24, 2018

New York Times: Andrei Sakharov's essay.

At it again...all for you.

by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World
Business writer.  Songwriter.  Protecting creator's copyrights. 

Where were you fifty years ago? 

I was a mere child dealing with an abusive family life while we ran from one town to the next just steps ahead of the law. What did I know of politics and world events? Nothing, that's what I knew.

But even I heard the name Andrei Sakharov and knew that he had been put in the gulag for daring to speak up about things that were wrong in his country. But that is all I knew. What country? Which wrong? 

On the 50th anniversary of Sakharov's essay being published in the New York Times, that publication is making available PDFs of the original three-broadsheet print for your perusal.  You can download and read it at this link.

They are running it to shed light on President Trump's Russia overtures and show that "The Hammer's" thoughts and, contrary to what P-HPCLDRSFC* think and FLOTSAM** writes, that his actions on the Russia Question are not out of line with seeking peace.

Where many will disagree with Andrei Sakharov is that Andrei was a believer, calling for the application of "pure ideals" without the "ruling classes" dogmatism. At the time, as those who know history can attest, the United Soviet Socialist Republic, or U.S.S.R, was hiding from the world — and its own citizens — all the warts of its application of Communist ideology. Which is why around the same time as Sakharov, Communism and its sister Socialism got real popular with professors on college campuses. Also, serial killers terrorized U.S.S.R. citizens because to admit they existed within their borders would be to admit that their brand of ideological rule was not working. 

But the world has seen behind the veil of the Sovs marketing campaigns and now know they have worse problems than anyone could imagine. Hell, openness even made it possible to make a movie, Citizen X, about just one situation. 


P-HWPCDLRSFC is Pussy-Hat Wearing Politically Correct Democrat Liberal RINO Socialist Fascist Commies
** FLOTSAM means For Liberal Opinion That is Serious and Actually Matters

Monday, July 23, 2018

Playing with the Lion's Tail.

At it again...all for you. 
by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World
Business writer.  Songwriter.  Protecting creator's copyrights. 

Well, more specifically, Rouhani said not to play with the lion's tail or else the U.S. would get the "mother of all wars." 

It is at this point that your Citizen Journalist would like to stop and point out that the president of Iran, or else his speechwriters, need a history lesson. 

Granted, The Great War started with what looked like a small assassination and later inflated into what we now call World War One, and the same could happen here. But the archduke and his wife was no small assassination as the pieces were already in play by Communists and Socialists to take over the world and he was a mere match to get the thing going.

Mr. Rouhani believes that his country has a commodity that the rest of the world needs so desperately that they are willing to put up with his religion-based dictatorship ways. What the Iranian president fails to understand is that stronger forces are at play. I shall enumerate. 

One: In order to protect the human rights of people they do not know, freedom lovers are willing to play with the lion's tail, even if they put themselves in danger. 

Two: Almighty God, Yahweh or Jehovah, the English version of his name, has other purposes and no man is stronger than He, and is actually stronger than any other God or prophet. 

And three: Lions are just pussycats waiting to be stroked as is evident in this Internet search screenshot:


Sunday, July 22, 2018

Out with the old! In with the new "more daring messages"?

At it again...all for you. 

by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World

Progressive policies, or what a young woman called "more daring messages". 

How daring did she get? She is backing Abdul El-Sayed, a 33-year-old advocate of single-payer health care running an uphill race in Michigan to become the country’s first Muslim governor.

That's right. Her candidate is a daring choice as he is completely different from any other P-HWPCDLRSFC* candidate that exists or has ever existed including those old people who are running around now claiming to represent the young folks.

You can tell I'm being sarcastic, right? Oh, good. I was worried there, for a second, that you might think I had fallen for the brilliant new campaign slogan of the DNC that goes...

Now just how did that go? That's right. "For the people." It was even on YouTube. You'll love it because, after paying for an expensive focus group, they stole it from Morgan & Morgan Law  Office right here in The Big ATL —

The slogan works well for Morgan & Morgan, and even though I'm from Atlanta, I've never met them, but dang if they don't seem to really care about the people they represent. But, see, that law firm won't take just any old case. No, they will actually confirm that it is possible to make somebody pay for bad deeds according to the law, whereas all P-HWPCDLRSFC don't want to help the people. No! They want the rich people to pay for the poor people, but they want to destroy the rich people and only have poor people.

Wait! That doesn't even make any sense. I'm not sure I have that correct, but then again, isn't that what a single payer health system is all about?

A Muslim running for governor for Michigan and a self-avowed Socialist running in New York for congress? The latter young and pretty; the former young and manly looking? And everybody claiming this is the New Face of the Democratic party? It isn't a new face. It's the same face.

Remember, boys and girls, there is more going on here than meets the eye. First and foremost, never forget God's purposes in world affairs. He lets humans rattle on until He needs something in particular done to get closer to His goals. It is my opinion, and I state that strongly because who am I to claim to have a pipeline to God?, that we are in one of those times wherein God's intervening hand is being felt more strongly. That means that radicals — and in that I include the P-HWPCDLRSFC — will have less influence and more calming, balanced influences will rise.

Watch and see. 


* P-HWPCDLRSFC is Pussy-Hat Wearing Politically Correct Democrat Liberal RINO Socialist Fascist Commie