The Most Brilliant Woman in the World
Business writer. Songwriter. Protecting creator's copyrights.
DATELINE: TODAY.
CLOCK: SOMETIME THIS MORNING.
WHERE: ATLANTA-ISH, GEORGIA
Nut graph:
Mr. Lou-Lou Frakkakhan is working hand in hand with pussy-hat wearers who oppose the famous and witty play The Vagina Monologues.
Mr. Lou-Lou Frakkakhan is working hand in hand with pussy-hat wearers who oppose the famous and witty play The Vagina Monologues.
Main body of arrrrtickle:
While Lou-Lou (as he would prefer to be known) chants "DEATH TO AMERICA AND JEWS!", Socialist haters chant "CHANGE THE SCRIPT OR SHUT IT DOWN!"
Frakkakhan and an anonymous androgynous ambisexual gender fluid studies leader issued a joint press release at a live event on some stairs in front of a government building somewhere wherein they confirmed their joint goal of annihilation of common enemies by any means.
"We stand before you today," Frakkakhan boomed into fawning FLOTSAM microphones. "And because we stand here YOU. MUST. TAKE. US. SERIOUSLY. Hold your questions while my fellow opposition leader speaks."
The anonymous androgynous ambisexual gender fluid studies leader then moved to the bank of microphones and waited for the cameras to stop making that racket so she could be heard clearly. "Good afternoon, evening, morning, or whatever time of day you decide it is. We are inclusive of all time-counting methods and opinions except for Drumpf's because he is wrong all the time. Please! Please! Hold your questions AND YOUR APPLAUSE. Not really. Just hold your questions."
Frakkakhan was forced to jump in, "Death to FLOTSAM if you don't shut up and let my esteemed colleague speak!" FLOTSAM shut the hell up because as good little socialists, they know a real threat when they see it. Frakkakhan continued. "That's better. As you were saying, Dear 'anonymous androgynous ambisexual gender fluid studies' Leader?"
"Thank you, Lou-Lou. We need to talk about your shoes later. Niiiice. I assume they are not real leather? Oh, they are OLD leather. Then that is okay. But let me finish with my statement: We stand before you today. In all our fluid genders. EXCEPT. For actual females because they are trying to steal the thunder of Lou-Lou and our transgender friends who do not have a real vagina and who hate America and Jews. But basically what I want to say is — Lou-Lou is so brilliant in his oratory — 'What he said'."
The fawning press corps were left holding mics, shoulder-mounted cameras, and unasked questions as the anonymous androgynous ambisexual gender fluid studies leader and Lou-Lou, surrounded by armed guards that looked 100% male (Lawzuh MURZEE!), left in an armor-plated limo owned by The Little People LLC, a non-profit organization that serves to keep all children safe except for the ones who stubbornly insist they are 100% of a single gender/sex, also known as what God called male and female.
** FLOTSAM means For Liberal Opinion That is Serious and Actually Matters
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