#Lice Alert - Be Careful Trying on that Halloween Mask

by Kim D.

It's that time of year - the hunt is on for the perfect Halloween costume, but be careful when trying on masks, hats, wigs, etc. or you may be in for a huge trick instead of a treat. A report from Channel 11 News out of Toledo, OH warns that lice could possibly be lurking in Halloween costumes.  

Now maybe it's a baseless fear, but I have it - so much so, if I hear the word "lice" in my community, I break out the preventative shampoo for my seven-year-old son.  I've never had a lice experience - ever - and don't want to have one based on the horror stories I've heard from people who have had to deal with such an outbreak.  


The head louse, a parasitic insect found on the head, eyebrows, and eyelashes of people, feeds on human blood. Sounds worse than the creepiest of clowns, right?  These nasty horrors are found worldwide, but here in the U.S., most infestations begin at the pre-school or elementary school level.  According to the CDC, 6 to 12 million infestations occur yearly, targeting children in the age range of 3-11.

So, how are they spread? Lice do not hop, jump, or fly.  They crawl and are spread by direct contact with an infected person.  That means, quite simply, that if a kid with lice tries on a Halloween mask or hat, possible transfer of this critter occurs to the next person.  

So what should you do if you have pediculophobia like me and are terrified of the thought of a lice outbreak? Wearing a swim cap could serve as a barrier when trying on hats and wigs.  It might also be good to put purchased items in a sealed plastic bag for 48 hours to kill any lice. For costumes, it may be a good idea to put them in a dryer for 45 minutes on high heat to get rid of potential critters.

Hump Day Quickie: Nerves of Stone.

by Angela K. Durden 

Tom Petty: Cherished the battle

by Angela K. Durden
Technology inventor protecting creator's copyrights. Business writer, novelist, songwriter, and Citizen Journalist.

Billboard writer Gavin Edward said, "All [Tom's] songs feel joyful...not just because The Heartbreakers could play like their amplifiers were on fire, but because Petty cherished the battle more than the victory."

That statement caught my attention because I understand it, and it helped to explain why I've liked their songs. 

Paying dues was never more true than when one thinks of Tom Petty. Especially in anything creative, paying dues is not just one battle. Petty always remembered that dues paying never stops.

Petty's songs and The Heartbreakers' music were their own.

 
They had their sound. Their vibe. 

With lyrics that never preached, never told, but showed us the stories that define the human condition no matter the age in which one lives. 

Inviting us on a journey to go within, examine ourselves as they examined themselves.

Tom Petty. 

Gone just eighteen days shy of beginning his sixty-eighth year.

Cherishing the battles — artistic and otherwise — until the very end. 

"Guns for me, none for thee" say Politically Correct Liberal Socialist Democratic RINO Commie Fascists

by Angela K. Durden
Technology inventor protecting creator's copyrights. Business writer, novelist, songwriter, and Citizen Journalist.

Bodyguards carrying guns — eek! — aren't just for leaders of countries who by default are targets of assassins whether they be wannabees or for real. Nobody blinks an eye about that. Obama had armed protection and you never heard him complain about it even as he was preaching for sanctions limiting the rights of the citizenry to protect themselves.  

"Guns for me, none for thee." 

To a person, Constitution-gutting Politically Correct Liberal Socialist Democratic RINO Commie Fascist leaders want you to be deprived of the very thing that was used to defend the freedoms they so rely upon. To make that happen, those leaders have employed thought control techniques on walking brain-dead dupes and knowing accomplices such as:

• hosts of late-night comedy shows, 
• hosts of talk shows in every time slot,
• children of now-dead but famous singers/actors, 
• listed Hollywood elites including those on lists A through Eff-U,
• #CrunkNewsNetwork and other no-longer-trusted mainstream media outlets,
• publishers, editors, and writers for newspapers and business and popular magazines, 
• hired-gun talking heads,
• retirees from the above categories seeking free column inches,
• founders of social media companies,
• Tech Giants, The Majors, and The Bigs,
• the "If I had a son" last past president, 
• university leadership teams,
• pussy-hat wearers,
• wuss male supporters of pussy-hat wearers, 
• anyone who self-identifies as a marginalized person,
• among others.

Yes, boys and girls, they all believe the same thing —

Put power in the hands of The Enlightened, they preach.  

Except the definition of who is one of The Enlightened is so broad the country is quickly harking back to the days of English kings and queens and all their power-grabber ancestral lines going backward and forward in time who saw opportunity in the vacuum to grab all the power for themselves.

Nature and people abhor a vacuum and the filling of it is never a pretty thing to start with. But how did these power grabbers grab power? They used force on a population that thought they were kings of their own castles and lords of their tiny plots of land and — this is important, so listen up — never thought to put defenses in place.  

Eventually, some said enough is enough and came to a new land, founded a federal government they envisioned as having limited power, with states having much autonomy, and what power the Feds would have would be simply to have mutually beneficial services and defense from enemies.

Yes, we know the founding of the country was messy, bloody, full of drama, and never perfect. But...

But there came a time when the people who lived on this continent said, "You know. We're all having to share this space. Let us put rules down about that sharing." 

The Declaration of Independence put the kings on notice in 1776. They hit back with attacks. Local folks defended themselves. The Constitution was ratified in 1789 putting everybody within the country's borders on notice that should the government get out of hand again, they had a right to defend themselves against it.

Thus the Second Amendment was written in this fashion: 

A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.

The right of regular folks to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed even by a well-regulated government-sponsored force that is also necessary to defend the security of a free State.

From Wikimedia Common

Ding! Ding! Ding! And we have a winner.

by Angela K. Durden
Technology inventor protecting creator's copyrights. Business writer, novelist, songwriter, and Citizen Journalist.

When it comes to getting a project done, I have this habit of putting my head down, pumping elbows, and watching my feet (from here on out acronymed to HDPEWF). Nothing will distract me once I determine what needs to be done. I am the queen of concentration. Normally, such a skill set is a good thing; say, if you're starting a business or responding to an emergency.

Gitterdun. That's me. 

But such a mindset is not a good thing when you have children as children are the worst when it comes to exploiting a weakness. Water will find the path of least resistance and wear a canyon through a mountain. I was that mountain and my children were that water. 

Case in point #1: Daughter

There came a point wherein I began to realize a pattern in the girl. On this particular day she exclaimed loudly as she was wont to do, "I have nothing to wear! Oh, woe is me for having a mother who will not keep my laundry done." 

HDPEWF as I was, I responded, "Oh, no! Whut? I swear to God, child, I just did all your laundry three days ago."

Thirteen-year-old girl self-righteously points to empty drawers as proof her mother is a lazy moronic employee. Now, lazy and moronic I am not. Slow on the uptake, I grant you that as I reference HDPEWF. But not lazy and not moronic and the girl went just a little bit too far that day. 

If the girl had not overstepped herself I would probably still be doing her laundry to this day because...you know...HDPEWF. But she didn't and as I stood in her room and looked at multitudinous empty drawers and hangers that I knew for a certainty were full a mere three days ago, I heard it in my head.

DING! DING! DING! And we have a winner.

Going over to her laundry basket, I spied with my little eye clean and folded clothes thrown willy nilly into and around it. 

I shall spare you the gory details of the confrontation that followed. Suffice it to say the girl was unhappy as she lost a wonderful employee that day, but Mama sure did find a lot more time suddenly free up in her schedule. Which brings us to...

Case in point #2: Son

Back when print brokers could actually make money, I was a print broker making some damn fine money. I also did forms fulfillment for a large car dealership group back when they used forms that had to be printed in bulk. Before technology came in and put all those forms onto this new contraption called a computer. This was a business that benefited from my propensity of HDPEWF.

My husband came home and saw me carrying heavy boxes from the truck to the second floor storage area and said, "Why is the boy not helping you?"

I stared at him blankly because it had never occurred to me to ask my baby boy to carry such big boxes. I mean, he was just this little child and to ask him, well, it would have been slave labor, and that was just wrong. 

I said as much to the father of my children. It was his turn to stare blankly. "Woman, that child is six feet tall, fifteen years old, and weighs more than me. He has man muscles. Make him use them."

What a novel idea. Why, what son wouldn't want to help his mother, right? Eagerly I went to the boy, who was watching TV as he sprawled on the sofa, and I said, "Boy, come haul boxes for your mother." 

He laconically replied, "Too heavy."

Slow on the uptake, that's me. Never once thinking the boy could be lying or self-deluded, I believed him, turned back to the task of the boxes, and began hauling again. 

Husband sees the situation and says, "Why is the boy not hauling the boxes?"

I explain about the dear child's inability to use his muscles and that to ask him to do so might hurt him. Husband turns off boob tube, turns to boy, and says, "Get your ass up and get to hauling for your mother. Now!" 

Is boy mad at Daddy? No, he is not. He is mad at Mother. But the boy gets up, complaining the whole time. Knowing Mother's penchant for HDPEWF, the boy goes about it as slowly as he could to try to force me into frustration and taking over the chore. Then the boy proceeds to say something snarky and quite disrespectful and right then I heard it in my head. 

DING! DING! DING! And we have a winner.

That's when I realize I just heard a man's deep voice coming out of a body that is taller and wider than my own. A body full of man muscles. See, if the boy had not overstepped himself, to this day I would be hauling the boxes for him. But he did overstep and I said, "Oh, Son. You will regret this."

We finished the boxes and I crooked my Mother Finger at his smart mouth, smiled, and said, "Follow me, you little twit."

We went down the basement steps to where his father was grinding on some piece of metal for a car he was restoring. I tapped Daddy on the shoulder. He stopped his grinding. 

I said, "I want to apologize to you. You were right. The boy's a lazy sumbitch just as you've been telling me. I deliver him to your hands to make a man of him."

The boy's eyes got big as Daddy proceeded to say, "Your ass is mine, boy." And for the next two years I never had to mow another lawn, haul wood for the fireplace, mop, sweep, put up dishes, haul another box up those stairs again, nor anything else I chose to have him do.

UPDATE! UPDATE! UPDATE!

Both the boy and the girl are grown adults and productive members of society. Neither are lazy. But my daughter recently realized she has the same condition as me, that is, she is afflicted with HDPEWF. She had the same discussions with her children who somehow had come to believe their mother was a lazy moronic employee whose only job was to make their lives easier. I am happy to report she has disabused them of that notion. 

No easy answer to the question of gun violence.

by Angela K. Durden
Technology inventor protecting creator's copyrights. Business writer, novelist, songwriter, and Citizen Journalist.

I made this short video of me using the interactive chart on gun deaths at FiveThirtyEight.com. I encourage you to go to the website and use it yourself. But...

...more important than this chart are the methodologies to collect information that goes into it. For instance, how a medical examiner labels a gun death decides which category in the above chart it will go into. 

Liberal Democratic Socialist Politically Correct Commie RINO Fascists who scream gun control and the NRA is the Devil, would never see an ambiguity if it walked up and slapped them in face. 

Yet the subject is full of ambiguity. Suicide, accicental, homicide, or unintentional death involving a gun? Which is it? You might think the answer is cut and dried, but it often isn't. Two medical examiners can see the same situation and come to different conclusions. And if the case goes to court, the surrounding facts can then change. Was it an intentional or accidental homicide? 

Does the technical term for the death reflect the situation on the ground? Often, no. In fact, all parts of the subject of guns are...well, subjective. 

Given that, the folks at FiveThirtyEight.com have done a fine job of parsing the data. They did such a fine job, that even that bastion of Liberal Media itself, the Washington Post, ran a story on the ambiguity of the subject. You can read that here. 

Of course, the big challenge is...

...how to get the Liberal Democratic Socialist Politically Correct Commie RINO Fascists to understand ambiguity. I don't think we can. 

The laws of probability say that if you are reading this article, then you understand the nature of ambiguity and the role it plays in life. You then can extrapolate from that its role in the subject of guns. 

But how many Liberal Democratic Socialist Politically Correct Commie RINO Fascists are reading this? If you are one of those, it would be most helpful if you could, pretty please, self-identify by leaving a comment below or emailing me at angeladurden@msn.com. 

Think about the Las Vegas shooting

When I hear "mass shooting", I always think it is one, maybe two, actors. But it can be more. Democratic government representatives, despots, dictators, and others in power, have ordered mass shootings. We tend not to think of those incidents if they involve race riots or genocide. But they are. 

See? Ambiguity quoted by MSM equals misled public. 

Which is why the likes of me are on the rise. 

Your Citizen Journalist thanks you for your time and patient consideration.

Crying Puddles: Online matchmaking summed up in song.

by Angela K. Durden
Technology inventor protecting creator's copyrights. Business writer, novelist, songwriter, and Citizen Journalist.


(AD)2 is the duo featuring me, Angela K. Durden bringing words and melody and such as that to the mix, and Piano Genius Alan Dynin.

I recently wrote a song called Crying Puddles. We performed it at the Joe Gransden Jazz Jam held every Tuesday at Venkman's in Midtown Atlanta. Venkman's live streams the stage with an iPhone from the back of the room so the phone picks up noise from the kitchen and waitstaff picking up orders, but you can still hear the song pretty good here.

You know, I even wore a dress this evening. Yes, I got gussied up. Here's the vid:

Crying Puddles

Lyrics by Angela K. Durden 

All Rights Reserved

(c) 2017 Angela K. Durden and Second Bight Publishing

There’s a song about making whoopee and

All the times you got for the opportunity to

Get it good, put your mind in a muddle.

But for me it’s been so long I’m Crying Puddles.

  

So I got proactive in looking for a mon.

Went to all these websites that ended in dot com.

Got lots of pictures that said “Look at us!”

Followed by offers of excellent service.

Oh, oh, oh. You know, know, know.

You know what I’m talking about.

Yeah.

  

Do you wanna hear what the men say?

I said,

Do you wanna hear what the men say?

They say:

“Are you feeling mean, girl?”

  

“I can make you scream, girl.”

  

“I got something you ain’t never seen, girl!”

Yeah, I’m Crying Puddles.

Lots of songs about making whoopee. But a

Lot of damn good they’re doing me    in

Finding man certified and bonified with

Talent specific leaving me cross eyed.

Yeah, yeah.

I’m Crying Puddles. 

Runnin' Down a Dream

Hef is dead. So why do I feel nothing about his passing?

by Angela K. Durden
Technology inventor protecting creator's copyrights. Business writer, novelist, songwriter, and Citizen Journalist.

I woke on the morning of September 28, 2017, to the news that Hugh Hefner was dead and I felt absolutely nothing. No joy in his death. No sadness at the loss of his presence. No passing of an era nostalgia. Not even the generalized acknowledgement that here but for the grace of God go I because — FACT! — if anybody lives long enough, they're going to die. 

Hef is dead. 

Searching.

Searching.

Searching.

Nope. 

Nothing, nada, zip, and zero. 

As a Citizen Journalist and an all-around caring person, I found this lack of response extraordinary. I usually have an opinion about such things. For instance, any news story that features a man — especially an old man — who must pop blue pills like candy just so he can put his whangdoodle in a new warm spot is just ewwww.

See? Opinion that I've held about the man. Hef should have taken a page out of Jack Nicholson's playbook when (eventually, thank goodness) Jack said there came a time when dating young women became unseemly. Now that is as a gentleman would do. I'm sure I shall shed a tear when Jack passes.

But not Hef. Not one tear in sight. Hef wasn't a gentleman. In fact, the older he got the more disgusting those pictures of him with women became, juxtaposed as they were with his decrepitness and their fresh and firm flesh. 

Again, opinion easily formed and stated on is which I think a lot of people agree with me because my Facebook feed was incredibly silent on his death. Only two people said anything about it and very few Liked their posts. 

Granted, the women used Hef as a marketing/branding position/option. In other words, free column inches for them. Quid pro quo and so forth. Still, you would think Hugh Hefner's death would have brought about another feeling that would lead to another snarky opinion. But it didn't. 

So why this lack of any emotion for Hef's death? It's simple. 

This lack is because the news came after an entire evening of being embedded with creative people from around the world. 

My friends own a popular live performance music venue in Midtown Atlanta (Georgia) called The Red Light Cafe. Ellen put out a desperate call on Facebook that she was without a door person for Tuesday and Wednesday. As they are a sponsor of the Atlanta Songwriter's Club, of which I am organizer, and are a friend to the live performance community, I messaged her and said that I would be happy to be the door on Wednesday. I was performing on Tuesday, so I couldn't be there that day.  

Michael setting up stage.

I had no clue who would be playing, but arrived at 5:30 to find a Malian band called Trio da Kali setting up the stage with Michael's help. (Ellen and Michael are married.) The trio would be joined that evening by South African Derek Gripper and the African String Project consisting of two other musicians from a couple of other countries. 

But as The Door, I got to sit directly next to the stage, up close, personal, and hear music the likes of which I don't usually hear. Then directly after that show ended at 10:30, the Gordon Vernick Jazz Jam set up and there was all this wonderful music from folks I know and love. 

That's when I sat in the back of the room at the bar, ordered Spinach Artichoke Dip and a Chocolate Martini, and simply relaxed. Here for your listening and viewing pleasure are photos and video snippets of my wonderful evening and the reason I had no feeling one way or the other about Hef's death. 

Derek Gripper and the African String Project

Trio da Kali

Trio da Kali were joined at the end of the show by Derek Gripper and the African String Project.

This fellow built this instrument himself. 

Gordon Vernick Jazz Jam

Budding musician and singer Hannah and her Daddy. 

Young student (left), Che Marshall (center), and Ramon Pooser.

Gordon Vernick (center) and Darren English (far right, on piano)

Hump Day Quickie: A Boy Named Sue?

by Angela K. Durden 

Too bad these guys didn't get their inspiration from Johnny.

Protecting and defending the Constitution of the United States is something we all must do.

by Angela K. Durden
Technology inventor protecting creator's copyrights. Business writer, novelist, songwriter, and Citizen Journalist.

Aren't you just loving the new wrappers on Snickers bars? I am.

More sponsorship deals are being lost by kneeling NFL players. From car dealerships to beverage distributors, companies are chosing not to put their money where they feel they are not being best represented.

On the other hand, USAA is continuing sponsorship saying they are doing it as a way to show appreciation for the military. Joining them in continuing sponsorship are Under Armor, Ford, Nike, Hyundai, Anheuser-Busch InBev, and Bose.

Stand or kneel. Sponsor or not.
In each instance, everyone is right.

Ladies and gentlemen, that is why the health of the Constitution of the United States is so vital. It is why the world comes to the U.S. by the millions to have a better life. There's a reason millions in the U.S. aren't going to other countries. I know U.S. citizens who thought it was better somewhere else and came back forthwith with hair-curling tales.

Yet, the Constitution has consistently been under attack since the early 1900s. There are those who want the protections it affords citizens to be destroyed because they want a socialist, communist, or fascist style of government.

They truly don't care which of the three styles because it all comes down to the same thing: Citizens' freedoms are gone.

Yes, there is drama around the NFL kneeling thing. And yes, it is getting column inches and airplay.

But what a great way to get attention on the multiple ways our Constitution is under attack. One of those attacks involves the rights of creatives to own and benefit from their own creations. Read more about that here.

So, good on the NFL management and all players,
sponsors and non-sponsors,
and supportive and non-supportive fans:
You are why the Constitution will remain strong.

"You first, Rich Karlgaard."

by Angela K. Durden
Technology inventor protecting creator's copyrights. Business writer, novelist, songwriter, and Citizen Journalist.

Rich Karlgaard, former publisher of Forbes and now editor-at-large, proceeded to post something on Facebook that pretty much insulted everybody who attended the music festival in Las Vegas.

You remember the one. The one where country music fans came to hear Jason Aldean and others sing, and then that domestic terrorist shot over 400 and killed at least 50 in the worst mass shooting in U.S. history.

Yeah. That one.

Let me show you the screen snip of Rich's totally Democratic Liberal Socialist comment. You will note my reply (second in the list) that had the link to the open letter I wrote to Anheuser Busch.

Well, boy howdy, did my reply ever get Rich's panties in a twist.

Like a typical liberal whose opinion is right all the time and his preaching is for my good, Rich cannot stand to have anyone disagree with him and he calls what I said a lecture. He did. He said, and I quote, "Stuff your lecture." 

But I am not running scared. No sir. 

So I replied, "You first." ***

You will note I did not say, "You first, you blankety-blankety blank blank." I did not do that because I am a lady.

***These videos will explain my reply much better. (Thank Snapchat filters for these.)

Open Letter to Anheuser Busch, or How to fight terrorism everywhere you find it.

by Angela K. Durden
Technology inventor protecting creator's copyrights. Business writer, novelist, songwriter, and Citizen Journalist.

October 2, 2017

Dear Anheuser Busch,

I rarely drink beer and can count on one hand football games I've watched in my lifetime. Still, I called y'all Sunday and left a message. Hope you've checked your machine, though I have a feeling that the message may get lost seeing as so many folks have been calling.

Let me be very clear: everybody knows NFL players are "taking a knee" for all the wrong reasons. But their "taking a knee" is going to be good in the long run for reasons they have no clue about. For that reason, your company should not stop advertising on the NFL shows because to do so would go completely against your company's fine tradition of supporting the Constitution of the United States.

In case you have forgotten — 

— that fine document is the foundation upon which millions, if not billions, of people depend. You got natural-born citizens of the U.S. You got legal immigrants here to seek opportunity and a better life. You got oppressed peoples around the world looking at the United States with hope — Hope! — and saying, "They did it. Freedom is possible."

Heck, as a company, y'all have depended on the Constitution to build your business —  and even go out of your way to hire people who fought to defend it.

Which means you owe it to your employees as well as your customers to understand the roar of the crowd calling for the heads of shortsighted NFL players. The fans know something is not right about what the players are doing. Hear them for that. But your job is to focus, focus, focus on what is actually happening and help the players to do a better job of choosing the hill on which they will die. 

To bring you up to speed, read this article I wrote in support of the NFL just the other day.  You will also want to read my totally brilliant but also spot-on serious article here I wrote last year when Colin first started this thing.

Unbeknownst to themselves, Colin and the others are making a stand for what the United States is all about, the reason it was formed in the first place, and the reason we have such a strong Constitution. 

You see, the Constitution guarantees freedom to think and act according to one's conscience in all things political and religious, and that economic sanctions should not be imposed by any entity in power because those stands are taken.

Way back when the kings of England ran folks out of their country to these shores and then exported their tyranny across the pond, it caused folks here to write a letter they called Declaration of Independence.

They laid out all the reasons the kings were wrong and set forth their intent. If you haven't read it, you should do so now. 

But even then the 56 declarers of independence knew that most folks don't think deeply or long-term. That's why they said, and I quote — 

Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed.

In other words, the writers (many of whom liked beer and, I daresay, brewed their own) understood they should not make any decision hastily. Therefore, before they declared independence, they allowed the English king to prove he was not going to change.

There is no doubt the NFL's business is being affected negatively because these guys are taking a knee for all the wrong reasons. So, as a business decision, all this is not good, as I wrote in this article. And you, as a company, will not want to pull your ads hastily. Find another way because —

Isn't it at times like this when one should act with prudence? 

Taking a knee is not the problem because the real problem is what has been happening behind the scenes for over a hundred years: There is a concerted and growing effort to gut the protections of the Constitution of the United States and turn it into a country ruled by one of the Big Isms. Read what I say about that here.

NFL players who are taking a knee themselves do not know they are defending the Constitution of the United States. But they are defending it. Granted, that defense is getting buried in a mucky mess of political correctness and it is that political correctness you should be fighting because it is designed to destroy freedom.

Dear, dear, dear Anheuser Busch. You who have the hearts, ears, and eyes of millions of folks on and with you. Yes, it is you who should get that marketing agency of yours busy on a series of ads lauding the fact that the Constitution is so strong it will defend the freedoms of even those easily manipulated idiots on the field.

Get them to put together a kick-ass ad campaign that will show domestic and foreign rabble-rousers — hell, let's call them what they are, terrorists — just how much the U.S. citizen will not put up with.

I can see it now. That cute dog of yours makes a stupid decision and goes to play in the woods all alone. Doggy sees other dogs, not knowing they are big, bad, and mean. Doggy is set upon! Doggy yelps. Your horses hear their dog friend yelping "Help! Help!" Horses come galloping around the corner as a body and kick the sh*t out of the predators. Horses safely escort Doggy home. Happy ending.

See? Brilliant! Metaphor dripping everywhere.

Fans will love it. Terrorists will not, but they'll get the point.

Do your duty. 

Sincerely,

Citizen Journalist.
Lover and defender of freedom.
But not a beer or football fan.

HDMDSC: My Creep Detector Deflector

by Angela K. Durden
Technology inventor protecting creator's copyrights. Business writer, novelist, songwriter, and Citizen Journalist.

When I need to determine if a person is as much of a creep as they are leading me to believe, I often deploy a shibboleth I have named Heavily Drawled and Mispronounced Deep South Colloquialisms, or HDMDSC.

After a bullet through the brain or heart — my most favorite and yet least deployed method — HDMDSC is the fastest way to remove social roaches as ever I've ever found. It is instantaneous and has the added benefit of avoiding an expensive trial and much prison time. 

HDMDSC also has a second and just as important role: It identifies friendlies. 

I am not alone in doing this, though I am the only one who has named it. Yes, my brilliance at coming up with acronyms has been astounding you for months now. I will give you a moment to collect yourself and return your attention to my carefully chosen words that I've written for you, big boy, all for you...wait, wait, wait...sorry...I was letting loose my inner-Barbra Streisand there for a minute. I'm back with you now.

Back to the topic: I am not alone in deploying HDMDSC. I know a writer here in the Deep South by the name of Hollis Gillespie. You may have seen us on The Tonight Show together. We killed 'em! Johnny invited us over to the desk and everything. Okay, I'm lying. I was never on The Tonight Show. Let me be clear: I watched it, but I was never on it, though I did not know until this morning that Hollis had ever been on that show. 

Hollis is so famous she has a cartoon of herself.
***See footnote.

How did I find out Hollis was on The Tonight Show? I found this out because I, as your Citizen Journalist, did a deep-dive research that began and ended with typing her name into a search bar and clicking on the first site with her name. It was exhausting. You see how hard I work for you?

A fancy Nueva Yawk magazine's editorial board began hearing her name bandied about at their cocktail parties. An executive from that board decided it had been so long since they had a writer from the Deep South write for their magazine that they were being accused of not being inclusive enough, so of course, naturally, they simply must get Hollis to write for them.

Hollis made the deal and wrote a brilliant piece. Why, it was so brilliant that it immediately became a HDMDSC social roach finder. Yes, I know...roaches and Nueva Yawk pretty much is a redundant statement in some circles.

Deeply resenting her task, the tight-skirt-wearing-daggered-and-painted-nails underling assigned liaison duty with the writer from the Deep South scanned Hollis' word-count-perfect article and said —

"This is not our style."

This conversation happened on the phone long before there was Skype or Google Hangout because the unmistakable expression on Hollis' face would've been sure to cause the underling's panties to get in a twist. Yes, ladies and germs, Hollis' expression said "You ain't the sharpest knife in the drawer, now are ya? Bless your little ol' heart."

Translated into Manhattan Speak is, "Sooooo...what year did you graduate and from which of the seven sisters was that?"

But never one to allow manners to get in the way when a witty riposte will cut through the crap, Hollis said, "Exactly. That's what I do. I don't write like your magazine. That's why you are hiring me for this."

Underling's panties got in a twist and...well, suffice it to say Hollis rewrote it in their style (hey, money is money). It sucked and she never wrote for them again.

Not that they ever asked. (But a contract is a contract.) See?

HDMDSC deployed. Problem solved.  

***FOOTNOTE: Your Citizen Journalist is also so famous, she too has a cartoon of herself. So there! Take that, Hollis. That's what you get when you don't invite me onto The Tonight Show with ya. 

Slippery slope to the Big Isms.

by Angela K. Durden
Technology inventor protecting creator's copyrights. Business writer, novelist, songwriter, and Citizen Journalist.

Yeah. This is humorous.
But the subject is much more serious than this. 

When Colin Kaepernick started his public thing last year I wrote an article in defense of his right not to be forced into public displays of patriotism. You will want to read my totally brilliant but also spot-on serious article here.

Unbeknownst to himself, Colin was making a stand for what the United States is all about, the reason it was formed in the first place, and the reason we have such a strong Constitution. Which reason was formed and defended, I might add, at great sacrifice by thousands, nay millions.

Google Search screensnip.

And while I do not have a problem with Colin or anybody else not saluting the flag, come to find out the NFL has been taking money each year from government entities to put in flag ceremonies. Government-funded fan marketing. Hmmm...

So the short-sighted owners have brought this war to their own doorsteps. Idiots? Maybe.

Like many gubment programs that seem good to start with, this one has gotten out of control.

"The Hammer" should know better
than to diss the right to protest.
Hello? Donald? 

Now many players are taking a knee in protest of this and that. The whole subject even has Donald Trump spouting his opinion using cuss words and slinging Yo mama insults.

"The Hammer" should know better than that, but he might very well be using this debacle as an opportunity to deflect attention elsewhere. Everybody has their limits when under fire.

As a business decision, all this is not good, as I wrote.

But isn't that when one should stand up even more? Private companies might have a right to demand their employees do certain things that go against their religion, politics, or personal belief system. They might even have it written into their employment contracts.

But such things like that do not a free country make.

Business requiring such acquiescence backed up by threat of economic sanctions sure does sound a lot like how Hitler started getting his power.

Many folks — soldiers and civilians alike — who fought for and defended the Constitution on the battlefield and through the Court, may not truly understand that their righteously patriotic indignation against football players is misplaced.

NFL players who are taking a knee themselves do not know they are defending the Constitution of the United States.

But they are defending it.

When government entities by law or hook-or-crook, private enterprise via economic sanctions, or your preacher or your daddy or your good buddy via public humiliation, attempts to force you to prove your patriotic or religious quality, then we are on the slippery slope heading fast toward the big isms: Communism. Socialism. Fascism. And oligarchyism. (I made that last word up, but it will be a thing. You read it here first.)