Want to know how to be a better white person?

At it again...all for you.

by Angela K. Durden
The Most Brilliant Woman in the World

Citizen Journalist.  Novelist. Author of other stuff. 

Business writer.  Songwriter.  Protecting creator's copyrights. 

Don't worry. I, your Citizen Journalist, has scoured these Internets to find the one and only world-renowned wypipologist to tell you how. You will shortly hear from Mr. Michael Harriot who is, according to his Twitter page, "Sr. Writer at TheRoot.com, board-certified* Wypipologist, master race-baiter. His pen is mightier than your sword. Warning: Has been known to 'Jeer at whites'."

What is a wypipologist? Well, it is a new code word thunked up to describe a black person who can explain white people and explain the Black Experience to white people. "Wypipo" means white people. Ologist...well, you know that is.

Mr. Harriot wrote How to Be a Better White Person wherein he outlined six key factors, the first of which is so brilliant that I was not simply merely stunned, I was beside myself in another dimension called The No-Racism/Yes-Racism Zone. 

The first thing he said I have to do is realize I am white. I kid you not. That is step one. Somehow or another — you can click the link to the article above if you want all his wisdom in all its glory — but...somehow or another, when a black person tells me I am white, I am not supposed to get mad about being told I'm white. 

I know. The logic is overpowering. 

Step two: Recognize I have privilege. What does that mean? Harriot says it means, his words mind you, "White Privilege is the absence of racism....But in America, only white people get to do this." 

Step three: Know things and, this is important, don't come to a different conclusion than he does or else I will be...what, boys and girls? That's right. A privileged racist claiming not to be white and not to see color.

Step four: Talk to other white people about how racist they are and try to change them. He thinks he quoted MLK, Jr. He's not sure he did. His own words. See? Right here. "I think it was Martin Luther King Jr. who said: 'The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice.'
But if a white person is involved, the universe’s moral arc can turn on a dime."

One would think he'd confirm where the quote came from unless he's hoping for some sort of from-the-grave stamp of approval of his logic. But no matter where that quote came from, it is correct. Put another way, "The mills of the gods grind slowly, yet they grind exceedingly small." [Direct quote from the poem "The Mills of the Gods" by Charlie Wagg who used the quote thunked up by some guy named Plutarch.]

Step five: Talk to black people...but you got to listen. Why do I have to listen? Because not all black people think alike. And here all these years I thought they did. Duh! Doh! See my white privilege a-bustin' out all over? 

Step six: Think. Yes, know the history of slavery then ask myself what I am doing to stop it. Hang on, let me reread that again...yep, that pretty much sums it up. 

In any case, Mr. Harriot, the man who claims not all black people think alike and we shouldn't assume they do, assumes all wypipo do think and act alike, then proceeds to admonish all white people for thinking alike and pointing his pen at them for never doing anything about it. 

Oh, Mr. Harriot, bless your little ol' heart. It must be nice to have such a simple narrative to focus on.  

* Methinks Harriot's just having a joke on folks and waiting to see who actually believes him. In any case... 

SUPPORT YOUR CITIZEN JOURNALIST.

VISIT Consolidated Author Page

AND BUY A BOOK!