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| The Adult in the Room |
A Magnificently Methodical Southern Woman
and The Most Brilliant Woman in the World
and The Most Brilliant Woman in the World
You may enjoy reading this article I wrote entitled "How To Reason With A Liberal". Someone who took umbrage with my Hints & Tips and said I should be more like him, that is argue and debate by getting in their faces. This is my reply to him:
For instance, once I was having breakfast with a friend, a comedian. The owner of the popular Atlanta restaurant came over and the two of them began catching up. It had been awhile since they'd seen each other. I was introduced to the owner by my friend.
I'd been in three of my friend's shows as the musical break in his comedy act. It was lots of fun. Anyway, out of the blue the owner of the restaurant started insulting Donald Trump. At the time Trump had not even been chosen to run.
My friend jumped right in and I just sat there, listening, never saying one word. It was fascinating to watch. After about fifteen minutes of spewing vitriol, the owner made some wild statement, then turned to me and said, "Don't you agree, Angela?" (I no longer remember his statement, darn it. I wish I did.) They both turned to me and waited.
I said, "No. I don't agree."
What happened next was hilarious if it wasn't so sad. My friend's face turned beet red in anger, as did the owner's. Then for the next fifteen minutes they piled on, getting louder and more extreme, peppering me with questions they would not allow me to answer, until finally the owner said, "I will never serve you again. Don't come back." And the comedian said, "I can't believe you love Trump."
Trump, by the way, was not even in nor associated with the statement the owner made that he wanted me to agree with which just goes to show you neither could string together a logical defense for anything they were thinking.
But their spewing finally ended and I opened my mouth to speak. Here's what I said —
"You guys do realize that I'm not mad at you for speaking about what you believe, right? And that I wasn't stopping you from having that conversation? Yes?"
The owner had some choice words to say and stalked off. But my friend got to thinking. Though it took a bit, he finally calmed down whereupon we had a good conversation about the nature of having differences in opinion but still valuing the other person.
To this day, my friend adores me. I never bring up anything political. He won't bring up anything political without prefacing it with "I know you don't agree, but..." at which point if I disagree I just hug him and say, "Bless your heart. I love you anyways."
Now, why do I do that instead of jumping in loud and angry and trotting out stock gotcha phrases? Because I am trying to change their minds, not make their minds more entrenched. My ego does not need to say "Hey, I won that argument. Aren't I just an awesome debater?"
It helps that I'm a mother and have watched and dealt with temper tantrums aplenty, and that is all Liberals are doing, pitching fits. So I try to remember that I don't need to pitch another fit right along with them. That I am the adult in the room.
And that a spoonful of sugar makes the medicine go down.
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Born and raised in Georgia, Angela K. Durden is an author, publisher, editor, songwriter, performer, and more, living in the Metro Atlanta, Georgia, area. Support your Citizen Journalist and visit her Consolidated Author Page and buy a book. See more about Angela here. Want to watch a fun video about why Dems and Libs are scared of the Deplorables? Click the button.
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