Weasel Words: Advertising and Socialism

by Angela K. Durden 

May. Might.
Can. Could.
If. Then.

Advertisers of products appreciate the power of the Weasel Word. Of necessity, they cannot claim their product will always work for everybody the exact same way because there's one thing advertisers of products understand better than anybody:

There are no limits to what stupid can accomplish.
There are no limits to what attorneys for the stupid will sue for.

Then there are those who make products that will never work. Here is where you will find Weasel Words surrounded by big promises, and always followed by a fuzzy mice-type declarative. For instance:

GIANT FLASHY PROMISE ON SCREEN.
GET IT NOW! GET IT NOW!
DON'T WAIT!

YOUR EXPERIENCE MAY NOT BE THE SAME AS WE ARE CLAIMING IN OUR BIG PRINT. IF YOU LIVE IN ANY STATE WITH AN A IN ITS NAME, HAVE A MOTHER-IN-LAW, HAVE EVER BEEN DIVORCED, HAVE CHILDREN, OWN A CAR, ARE IN DEBT, AND IF WE CAN IN ANY OTHER WAY PROVE YOU DISQUALIFY FOR OUR WARRANTY, WE WILL DOUBLE-GUAR-O-DAMN-TEE YOU WILL GET SCREWED BY US.

But Socialists have taken the weasel word to the extreme. As in these Weasel Words in an article in The Globalist as trotted out again by Salon, here summarized by me —

Allegations abound that these actions by Trump are absolute proof of the president becoming a dictator and setting up of an authoritarian regime: 

Redundant personal being let go, fired, dismissed from “top” positions.

Few, if any, new hires for those “top” redundant positions.

Bloated budgets being cut.

Calling idiots the judges who work against the best interests of the country.

Firing employees of the Federal Government who refuse to do their jobs and in that refusal put citizens’ safety at stake.

Firing employees who will not meet with the boss to answer hard questions about what they’ve been doing in their jobs.

Firing employees so-loyal to their previous boss that they cannot do their jobs properly, including so-called watchdogs obviously snarling at the boss and letting the bad guys in.

Hiring employees who share a common vision to keep safe the country and its citizens.

Questioning (to confirm) legal authority by government agencies (ex: OGE, IRS, CIA, FBI, NSA) so they do not overstep their bounds.

Of course, says The Globalist, President Trump is doing all this with “ruthless determination” as he “systematically undermin[es]” any law agency that could check abuse of power for personal gain by him and his cronies.

All waivers are bad, Socialists say, except when we agree with them or when we do it.

Going public against us, Socialists say, is bad, bad, bad. 

Of course, if Trump was really setting up a dictatorship/authoritarian regime, this site would not exist. Nor this document. Among many others. 

Draining swamps is dirty business. Gators and skeeters and other such bloodsuckers do not easily give up their mud holes so easily; they will fight to the death and they will use all weapons at their disposal against the contractor hired for the job. 

See? Not one weasel word in the above paragraph.